Drunkenatheist,

Thank you for showing an interest in IKEA as an employer. After we looked at your qualifications we realized that unfortunately, at the moment, we don’t have any positions that are the right match for you. We wish you all the best in your job search and hope that you find the position that makes the most of your talents.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Yes, folks. 7ish years of work experience makes me unqualified to be the Head Furniture Booper at Ikea.

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