(AKA – A Defense of Trolling)

There are some things we need to note before I can continue with this post:

A) I’m a lil bit white trash.  I have no problems admitting this and, frankly, I’d rather come from working class roots than have everything handed to me by Mommy and Daddy without ever understanding the concept that life is expensive.

B) I enjoy a flair for the dramatic.  Yep.  I said it.  I enjoy conflict.  Note: confrontation is something I can take or leave, but I’ll handle it when it needs to be handled.  Conflict, on the other hand is 99% extreme lulz and 1% actually necessary for me.

These two points work together when I have been made a fool of or I’m pissed or whatevs.  I go through a very methodical thought process, in which I weigh the following:

1) Is it a problem large or important enough to be addressed?

2) Does the problem or issue involve unethical behavior on the other party’s part?

3) Am I willing to deal with the fallout that will inevitably occur from my actions?

4) Is there a way I can nip this in the bud without engaging in trolling (interwebz or otherwise)?

5) Do I care if it makes me look really bad?

6) How much of this is really just for the lulz?

For example:

Three friends decide to essentially cut me out of their lives for no apparent reason.  I find out, from a mutual friend, that they have spent the past few weeks trashing me to anyone who will listen.  The information they were using to trash me came from an ex and is hardly unbiased.  After calming down & milling it over for a few days, I decided to air some dirty laundry on a silly college campus gossip website.

Let’s break this down into the formula:

1) Queen #1, Queen #2 (and presumably Queen #3) trashing me: large or important enough to be addressed?

YES

2) Queens #1-3 using information from an ex against me: is it unethical?

YES

3) Am I willing to deal with the fallout that will inevitably occur from my actions?

YES YES YES YES YES

4) Is there a way I can nip this in the bud without engaging in trolling (interwebz or otherwise)?

No, I’ve tried to impress upon them that talking DIRECTLY TO ME is the best way to handle issues.

5) Do I care if it makes me look really bad?

No.

6) How much of this is really just for the lulz?

Umm..  Realistically?  Probably about 85-90%

As you can see, I take a lot into consideration before deciding to troll or otherwise inconvenience someone’s life.  And I try not to do it when angry, because when you’re angry, it’s harder to focus on your goal: extreme lulz.

Predictably, they found out and are now throwing a tantrum about this whole mess, without realizing that many people in this world wish that the worst thing they had to deal with was internet trolling.  (Humorous in itself!)  The best attempt at confrontation I received was a series of phone calls from Queen #2 last night when I wasn’t really in a state to hold a conversation, as well as a series of private phone calls throughout today.  Oh, and Queen #2 shouting that my hair and bag were “bad.”

So here we are, at an absolutely hilarious impasse and I’m stuck giggling to myself (and mutual friends).  I’m wondering if a tribute rap is in order?

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