As I said to my boyfriend after I stopped wishing for the sweet, sweet release of death, I refuse to buy the “sanctity of life” bullshit from pro-lifers.

Maybe it would be a lot easier to swallow this horseshit if the majority of pro-lifers were anti-war. But hey, who really cares about brown people? They don’t count, amirite? It’s cool to turn Afghanistan into a parking lot, but god forbid if I would like to utilize my constitutionally protected right to a legal medical procedure. Because oh fuck, we can’t kill the baybees, can we? That would be wrong. Unless it’s killing little brown children, of course.

And another thing, dude, I would swallow that shit a lot easier if these same pro-lifers supported stem cell research. I get it. You view abortion is murder. You view the women who have them and the doctors who provide them as murderers. You believe in the “sanctity of life.”

So, in your view, it’s better to incinerate these fetuses rather than use their stem cells to provide a breathing, feeling, sentient, born human being with a chance to cure their degenerative disease?

Stem cell research has become a far more maddening and frustrating topic for me since living with a roommate who has a degenerative disease. Obviously, I don’t understand what it’s like for him to live his life, as he has MS and I do not (nor do I have any diagnosed degenerative disease). But for fuck’s sake, I’ve seen him during both good and bad days. How can you sit and tell me that an unviable fetus has more of a right to life than he does? How can you sit there, look into your heart, and tell me that this motherfucker is beat because his cure might possibly require a dead fetus?

It seems to me that the pro-life movement should support stem cell research. Abortions already occur. They’ve been federally legal for 36 years. Prior to them being legal, they were still happening all the fucking time. Women will have abortions. Period. The legality or illegality is irrelevant. Why not let some good come from them? Furthermore, if the pro-life movement began to support stem cell research, doesn’t that mean that it might be easier to get stem cell research that doesn’t require the death of a fetus? If the funding is pumped into the research, maybe it might turn out that we can replicate stem cells without needing abortion, thereby better supporting a right to life for everyone.

I hate the “sanctity of life” argument. I would much prefer the argument that abortion is “ooky,” that your god tells you it’s bad, therefore you believe it’s bad, or that you just buy into the idea that women are dumb cunts who can’t make their own decisions for themselves. Cause let’s face it, when you cut through the bullshit, this “right to life” argument just boils down to religion, specifically Christianity; and although Christianity is so super pro-woman and in NO WAY SEXIST (holla at me, Eve!), be honest, Christianity [as well as so many other religions] are so rooted in sexist horseshit. I know, it’s shocking, isn’t it? So stop claiming that fetuses get some preferential treatment over adult humans and give me your real reasons for being pro-life. I’ll better accept “women are meant to serve men” than “omg! everyone has a right to life!”

And on an unrelated note, shut the fuck up with your blabbering that federal money pays for abortion. Unless you are referring to federal funding for Planned Parenthood (as well as other clinics) and are incredibly fiscally conservative, suck my fucking hypothetical dick. It doesn’t bother me when Libertarian Boyfriend bitches about pulling funding for various social programs/non-profits because he is CONSISTENT. His rationale isn’t “pull funding from PPH because it supports baby killing whores.” It’s “pull funding from everything and let corporations/private citizens fund them.” And though I disagree strongly with him on this point, I can respect it because he doesn’t have some fucked convoluted “pull funding cause I NO LIKEY ABORTION” ideology.

But most pro-life idiots who babble about federal money paying for abortion are almost always under the delusion that Medicare pays for abortion. Fucking Google the goddamn Hyde Amendment, you idiots. Under Hyde (passed in 1976), federal money (via Medicare) CANNOT BE USED FOR ABORTION. Period. State laws may vary, but if you hate it so much, fucking move to a state that doesn’t allow state funding to be used to pay for abortion. (Oh, just like so many people threw that sentiment around towards left-wingers during Bush’s monarchy administration.) Oh, and if you don’t like your tax dollars being used to fund OMG!MURDER!, then I guess all y’all should be uber pissed about funding Operation Iraqi Freedom, the war in Afghanistan, and the soon-to-be defunct Guantanamo Bay.

But that would be logical, right?

I’m also kind of sick of pro-lifers bitching about OMG! PRIVATE HEALTH INSURANCE PAYING FOR ABORTION! OMG! I’d hate to be the one to break it to you, but health insurance is not required to pay for either abortion or birth control. (And as even Libertarian Boyfriend pointed out, health insurance plans, including Medicare, should pay for abortion. Period. It’s a medical procedure and therefore should be covered under your medical insurance, even if that is federally funded.) I’d much rather have my health insurance paying for elective abortions or birth control than gastric bypass, or better yet, tummy tucks for gastric bypass patients.

Actually, that’s a comparison that I would love to see drawn more often. The pro-life movement bitches that abortion is unnecessary in most cases. (I’m talking the mainstream, moderate pro-life movement who makes exceptions for life/health of the mother, life of the fetus/severe fetal anomaly, and rape/incest.) I made my bed, I should lie in it; this is exactly what I want to tell my hypothetical children if they ever ask me why I chose to have them. Because I totally don’t want my children to think they were wanted. I want them to totally know that they were just my obligation.

Well you know what? You want to see more personal responsibility in men and women? Start fighting against health insurance companies covering gastric bypass, which is often a result of not putting the fork and fucking exercising once in awhile. Start fighting against health insurance companies covering heart attacks caused by eating 1/2 lb of baked mac and cheese in one sitting, ambulance rides for car accidents caused by erratic driving, rehab/detox programs, psych ward visits due to suicide attempts/threats, any health issues caused by obesity, cancer treatments for those who spent too much time in the sun or who smoked too heavily when they were younger, cirrhosis treatments for those who drink too heavily, endoscopies for those who stressed themselves so much that they developed ulcers, shooting victims who pissed off the wrong person or are too poor to move out of areas with high amounts of gun violence and drug cocktails for AIDS patients.

After all, these are all medical treatments we receive for choices we each made. If you look at abortion as an issue of personal responsibility, then shouldn’t we extend that to everything our health insurance plans typically cover? So what the hell is the difference between my insurance policy – whether it is state/federally funded or not – covering these things and not a legal, constitutionally protected medical procedure?

Oh that’s right. It all comes back to the “sanctity of life.” Despite the fact that we – in the United States – don’t seem to put all that high of a value on people’s lives when it’s shipping the poor off in droves to fight in wars. Or when we tell poverty stricken people in the inner city (or hell, in rural areas like Appalachia) that they’re screwed when it comes to better enforcing gun laws. Or when we don’t do more to protect the LGBTQ community from homophobic acts of violence. Or when we can’t use can’t use stem cells from the precious fetuses to help cure or prevent degenerative diseases because we’re stubborn assholes who get a bug up our asses about where they came from.

Sanctity of life, my ass.