Lately, I’m just a little nostalgic for the days when our musicians trashed hotel rooms and shot speedballs to celebrate going platinum. I’m not saying that drug abuse and property damage are cool, but I am saying that if Axl Rose had been slighted, some muthafucka’s car would have gotten torched. Then he’d probably shoot a speedball to celebrate.

Thus proving the coolest thing Pete Wentz ever did was send millions of teenage girls to go view one of my favorite shock images. Obviously NSFW.

Lindsay Lohan, Pete Doherty and Amy Winehouse might be the object of constant ridicule, but at least their vices (and crazy) make them fucking interesting. I’d rather have my celebrities be trainwrecks than threaten to SOOO TWEET ABOUT THIS. When the celebrities of your generation are this fucking boring, how on Earth can you expect for the regular people in your generation to not be so fucking boring? Part of what makes celebrities interesting to follow is their inevitably fucked up personal lives and how horribly maladjusted being thrust into fame and fortune will make even the most normal of people.

Say what you will about Axl Rose (and don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of shitty things about the guy and his persona), but he at least kept shit interesting, which is more than I can say for this generation’s crop of celebrities. Give me Scott Weiland and his inability to stay out of rehab over some schmuck starting a Twitter war any day.

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